Breezy is off the Wheezy

Oh so much has happened. I did chop my hair off. Most people probably wouldn't consider it "chopped off" but it used to hang to the middle of my back and now it hangs to right at my shoulder blades so that's chopped off enough for me. It's blonder again. It looks fabulous! Once I get a picture, I'll post it.

Brett got into nursing school!!!!!!!! I am SO proud of him. And so excited for him. He has been waiting for this for so long, and after last year's completely unreasonable rejection, he deserved it more than anyone. Last night, I bought him a great small vineyards bottle of wine: Carazita. It is worth checking out. Also, I got him a card, and then Neil bought everyone Indian food, Brett's current favorite. He starts in August. One of the many impending celebrations (I'm sure) is tonight. And I know something he doesn't know.... :)

I caught up with the rest of the world and read The Da Vinci Code. Wow. That is the most concise way to put my review of it. But you all aren't so lucky, because I'm not stopping there today! It was probably the best book I have ever read in my life. I am not kidding. What made it so intriguing was all of the factual historical information! I was glued to my computer the whole way through it so I could bring up the different paintings and Google at my whim whatever I didn't know about. It makes me want to go back to the Louvre more than ever. I wish I would've paid more attention the first time around. I was right by some of the mentioned paintings and didn't even give them a second glance! I am kicking myself for it now. But I have vowed to make it back to Europe one of these days and by God I intend to! The famous Louvre pyramids - I have pictures of them all. With all of the information I gleaned from the book (with the help of the Internet), they are 10 times as fascinating. Did you know that the huge pyramid in front of the Louvre is made up of exactly 666 panes of glass? Interesting.... I can't really say anymore just in case a Da Vinci Code virgin is reading this. But - WOW. It made my mind spin. In a great way.

It must be Take Your Daughter (or Young Female Relative) To Work Day. Deanna came in this morning with her neice, who I am going to assume is around 12 or 13? I could be wrong but I think that's an accurate guess. I remember those days. I think I just stayed at home. But I found myself trying to look at this place from the neice's point of view. I would definitely rather be here than in middle school. The freedom to run errands, go to lunch wherever you please and just, well, be a responsible adult, is exhilirating! Compare that to being surrounded by peers of your own age and everyone is going through puberty and teasing abounds (especially in my unfortunate case way back when).... ick. No thank you. Makes a person really appreciate their job no matter how much they don't like it!

I've goofed off all morning. It's time to get cracking. On what? You guessed it: more impossible research....

It's a personal, internal debate really. Methinks I might chop it all off on Saturday. Maybe... It's getting really long, which I love but... well you see, curly hair is actually finer than straight hair. You just can't tell because of the volume curls provide. But the longer curly hair gets, the more it's weighed down. So now it just feels really fine and I don't like it. I thought this was what I wanted, and I never thought I would utter these next words but I miss my volume!! I remember the days when it was just a big poof-ball. *shudder*

I want to get it cut so it hangs just below the shoulders. Nothing too drastic but it'd still be a big change. I only have one question for Mandy, my hairstylist: is it going to be poofy? If she gives the wrong answer, I'll just go for a trim.

Hey I'm on a roll here! The past couple of entries have gotten me a comment each! Hmm. I think this entry is going to put a stop to that. I apologize for the lackluster blog this morning!

Disclaimer: This post contains two graphic images. I just thought I'd warn you.

Well I've heard some doozies over the past 24 hours. I can't decide which one is the worst.

First off, my momma got in a car accident on Easter. She's fine. But I got a voicemail on Easter night and it was her saying, "Hi Brianne, this is mom. I just wanted to tell you about my car accident," or something along those lines but nevertheless, she sounded almost bubbly. So I knew that it wasn't a really bad one and no one got hurt. She's driving home from church and this unfathomably ignorant girl runs a red light. My mom layed on the horn, the girl saw her and then sped up thinking that she could get through before my mom hit her. Well, my mom hit the back end of her car. Wow, what an idiot.

But it gets better.

Her mom walks out (their house was close maybe?), this woman is mother to a 19-year-old girl and looked to be probably in her mid-30s, covered in tattoos and was missing several teeth (including the front four)....classy. They attempted to dissuade my mom from calling the police but thankfully, my mom insisted on doing so. This woman had the police programmed into her cell phone. So they get there, this girl admits to running a red light, and two witnesses who had pulled over also atested to that. It turns out this girl didn't have a license on her either. And she threw away her temporary license because it got crumply. *banging head against wall* They also have a really shady insurance company.

I'm still not finished (can you believe it?)...

Yesterday my mom starts to deal with the insurance. Her insurance company warned her about her dealings with their insurance company because they're "tricky." So are the 19-year-old girl and her mother. One of them called their insurance place and told them that my MOM was the one who had run the red light.

Ok...

This is what happens when you have the intelligence of a slug (which, for the record, are probably smarter than these fine folks)... I mean really... how STUPID does one have to be to tell their insurance people that they had the green light when they had already told police the truth, written it down on a police report and knew there were witnesses? My head is starting to hurt as I write this. People's ignorance never ceases to amaze me.

Next contestant:

On the morning show I listen to religiously, Afentra's Big Fat Morning Buzz, they do a bit on Tuesdays called I Want An Apology Tuesday (you can listen Tuesday mornings if you'd like, they've got streaming audio online now). This morning, the mother of a 5-year-old called in. Her daughter plays with a friend; sometimes she takes them out to go bowling or what have you, other times the girl's dad takes them out. This involves an outing with the friend's dad. He was supposed to take them to see Ice Age 2: The Meltdown. Next thing she knows, her daughter is walking around the house trying to smoke everything and saying that she does it better than anyone else. So they called him today on the air to confront him about it. Here's what happened: they showed up to the movie theatre late so he just took them to a movie he wanted to see... Thank You For Smoking. He took two 5-year-olds to see this movie. So the mom is irate and asking him why her daughter is walking around acting like she's smoking and he goes, "I don't know! I told her not to do it. I told her it was bad. A lot of people take their kids to that movie!" and then Danny Boi (one of the DJs) interjects, "Yeah, tobacco lobbyists." The guy just keeps talking and says, "I didn't think she'd understand any of it. I just wanted to keep her busy." *popping a couple of Advil* It was kind of funny because he was so being Cliche Man. But he thought they wouldn't pay attention? Really? Little kids are walking sponges. I thought everyone knew that?? The last comment really blew me away, "I thought she was old enough I could explain it to her." Yes. You read that right. He thought that two 5-year-olds would understand smoking satire.

Final contestant:

*graphic image number 1*



Ah, Tom Cruise. What happened to you? It's best to keep your crazy Scientologist beliefs quiet. Don't you know this by now? I thought you'd completely lost it when you bought Katie an adult pacifier to keep her quiet during childbirth (yeah... right) but I guess I should know by now never to underestimate your insanity.

Apparently, after the baby is born, Tom Cruise plans to eat (put in his mouth, chew and swallow) the placenta and umbilical cord. In case you don't know how gross it is, this is what afterbirth looks like:

*graphic image number 2* (it's too gross to actually post in the blog)

According to Scientology beliefs, the afterbirth contains important nutrients and vitamins. God forbid Crazy Cruise let all that nutritious matter go to waste! *urp*

Excuse me while I go vomit....

I am this close to saying f*** it all - I'm not waiting until my year is up, I'm finding a new job NOW. I am so sick of getting the constant impossible research tasks!! I am here to work my way up to copywriter. I am NOT here to do research all the time - I'm not a researcher. They never give me writing assignments yet the research assignments flow like water. If it were easy, it'd be no problem. But it's things like they gave me this morning that make me want to snap. I did all these research for a new client, including demographic research for their four main markets that they want to target. Rob told me that was "wonderful research," that it was exactly what they needed. Until this morning apparently. Two hours before they have to leave to meet with the client, he basically tells me that what I gave him was crap and that he needs demographic information for the KC metro area, not just KC MO. So I Google it, I click on every link that looks relevant and some that don't but only find Census information which only goes by county or state. So then I get told to call the Chamber of Commerce, and the person I talked to there sent me back to a web page that I had already looked at. So then Rob wants me to get the info for a few specific counties. Which I do. But then he comes up to my desk and is all, "You called the Greater Kansas City Chamber? [as if I'm retarded and called the Overland Park chamber or something equally dumb] And they didn't have that information?" I proceed to explain to him that I already looked up the demographic information for the Metro's counties and all I'd have to do is add up the numbers (maybe simple math eludes him but I'm capable of doing it) to get the Metro's information. It's like he didn't even hear that. Then he tells me to call the KCK Chamber and the Mid America Regional Council because "that information exists somewhere, find it." What the f***. I have the information in my HANDS that would take 5 minutes to add everything up and he's telling me to call these places to get it?? He's such an arrogant, hearing-impaired ASSHOLE!!! God I hate him! Why the hell doesn't he try to find it? I would LOVE to see him try. And then I'd be ready to accept a groveling apology. Seriously though, this research crap has got to stop. I am wasting my time here getting "experience" that is irrelevant! I realize that research is incorporated into the communications field somewhat - but they're asking me to do in-depth research like it's my only purpose around here. It's getting out of hand and I'm not going to put up with it if I don't have to. If I can find a better job, I'm takin' it.

Scroll back down to the Second Chance Prom entry - the Buzz finally posted pictures so I changed mine.

Did anyone see the story about the boy whose mother died because when he called 9-1-1 the operator dismissed his call as a prank? Yeah. I sincerely hope that dispatcher loses her job. She, and the other dispatcher handling the call, are still on the job while a full investigation is being conducted. That's crap. At least suspend them. I feel so bad for this poor kid. He is 6-years-old. His mom passed out so he calls 9-1-1 only to be told to "stop playing on the phone."

In a related experience (only in the sense that 911 is involved) I came home from work one night all kinds of excited because I had just met Vanilla Ice (he came into Outback!) and I pick up the phone to call my friend. I misdialed with the area code so I hung up and redialed. Apparently I had dialed 9-1-1 in the process. So I'm on the phone with my friend and I hear a knock at the door. I MISDIALED 9-1-1 and they sent cops over. Which is great really because that means that they're doing their job. But when a kid calls - a little kid - they should never be so presumptuous to say "don't play on the phone" and hang up on them. They should always, always take them seriously!! That's just awful.

That was the rockin-est prom ever!! Oh my goodneess what a blast. I'll find some pictures to post once the Buzz puts them on their website or Brett gets them off his phone. I've been kicking myself since last night for not bringing our own camera. Everything was better this time around. Everything. As Brett dubbed it, this was Prom Done Right. My senior prom chose this sub par venue which is located behind a big rig park. They used to hold it at the Indian Center downtown, by the river - a place 10 million times classier than the freaking Cotillion. Prom Done Right? A beautiful Spanish-inspired theatre with gorgeous ceilings and a grand staircase, located in downtown Kansas City. Much much much much much better. There was alcohol at this prom. The Dresden Dolls played at this prom. That was the best. I love the Dresden Dolls!



They appeared on stage wearing dresses. Both of them. Amanda was in this puffy-sleeved, off-the-shoulder purple taffeta nightmare, it was great. Brian came out in this green floaty dress (yeah, I'm on a first name basis with the Dresden Dolls, I'm cool like that). They are just hilarious. And so talented! Amanda plays keyboard (sooo awesome) and Brian plays the drums. I was a little disappointed they didn't play Girl Anachronism though. I wanted to impress (read: annoy) the people standing around me with my knowledge of every single word of that song. If you've heard it you know that is actually impressive. But they more than made up for it for their dazzling rendition of Simple Minds' Don't You Forget About Me. It was AWESOME! Everyone was jumping up and down during the "la la la's" - the girls sans their shoes, of course. Oh god, by the time we left, I took my shoes off and walked on the concrete barefoot. I don't care how gross it was, there was no way my feet would have survived had I left the killer heels on. They sure were cute though. Anyway I digress.

They had their table set up with merchandise, albums and other goods. Brett and I were checking the table out when something caught my eye - an order form for Dresden Dolls SHEET MUSIC!!! I emailed them a year and a half ago telling them they should put out some sheet music, that I would totally buy it. It was $40. It's more than 200 pages which justifies the high price tag. I can't wait. It is going to be so worth it and I will amaze everyone with Dresden Dolls songs.

The Dresden Dolls will get even more of my money once their new album comes out for real. It leaked on the Internet but that version is crappy I've heard. Gotta wait for the good quality. It will be mine.

So after a long night and very little sleep, here I am at work. And I couldn't even wear jeans and flip flops today. We have a meeting and a luncheon. Blast... I can handle it though. I'm tough.